Cam Girl Diaries Podcast – Episode 88

Featuring OVmilf Erica

Host: Gary
Guest: OVmilf Erica

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Opening

Gary: Welcome to Cam Girl Diaries, the podcast where real cam girls share real stories, real advice, and real experiences from inside the cam industry. Whether you’re a creator or you’re just curious about what goes on behind the scenes, you’re in the right place.

Make sure you like, comment, and subscribe. You can also follow the podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and wherever you listen to podcasts.

Today’s guest is OVmilf Erica, and I have to say, I love your tagline: “The Internet’s Favorite MILF.” You’ve also got “Your Future Stepmom.”

Erica: So you’re going to be my stepmom? I’m going to be your mommy.

Gary: Good boy.

Erica: I don’t know. I love when they tell me, “Tell me I’m a good boy.” I’m like, “You’re such a good boy.”

Gary: That’s your thing.

Erica: It really is. Some of them are in their 50s and they’ll ask me if I’m breastfeeding. I’m like, “No! The last time I had a kid was 18 years ago. What are you talking about?”

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Getting Into Camming

Gary: You started in phone sex, right?

Erica: Yeah. I was a phone sex operator for four years. I worked for a company called Phone Stars, which was contracted through Night Flirt.

You could have different personas. I had two. One was a college girl, and the other was more of a divorced cougar type. You weren’t even using your own picture. It was somebody else’s.

I was one of the top earners, but I barely made anything. You made around $1.75 a minute, so you had to keep people on the phone.

Where I really made my money was doing party lines. There would be groups of guys on the phone, and that’s what I became known for.

Gary: I’ve never really thought about phone sex. The ’90s were obviously a huge time for that.

Erica: Definitely. It was a whole different world.

Then I got fired from my job after the management changed. I had COVID, I didn’t go to work, and my new manager basically gave me my resignation.

I’d also been a bartender for a lot of years.

When COVID happened, everyone was starting OnlyFans, but I didn’t want to do OnlyFans because everybody was doing OnlyFans. So I joined Fanvue instead.

I’d been a young mom, so I’d always been called a MILF. I figured, “Let me play into that niche.”

I started with the good-boy, mommy-boy, femdom type of content. Then I started dabbling in camming.

My original platform was Cam4. I wasn’t consistent at first, but eventually I quit bartending and decided I was going to do adult content full-time.

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Why She Chose Independent Content Creation

Erica: I was even talking to an adult agency at one point, but I decided I didn’t want to do that.

I like being on my own. I don’t want somebody else controlling what I do.

So I stayed in Ohio and continued doing my own amateur content online. I own a business, and my cat basically pays for everything else.

Gary: What’s your main platform now?

Erica: Stripchat is my main one. I also do well on MyFreeCams.

I’ve tried Chaturbate because my friends kept telling me I should. I’ve been signed up for a couple of months and I still haven’t done a private there.

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Erica’s First Cam Show

Erica: I have to tell you about my very first live show.

I was on Cam4 and somebody started talking to me in DMs. I thought we were in a private show. He said he was going to give me 1,500 tokens and wanted me to show him my ass.

I agreed, got up, and did it.

Then I looked at the screen and realized I wasn’t in a private show at all.

There were more than 300 people watching.

Gary: Oh no.

Erica: Yeah. I had just shown all of them.

The guy had made it look like he’d tipped me, but he hadn’t. Fortunately, another cam model messaged me and explained what had happened.

I felt terrible. I thought I should have known better, but she told me that people did it all the time.

Now I can spot that scam from a mile away.

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Dealing With Trolls and Difficult Customers

Erica: I’m not one of those models who kicks people out just because they don’t tip. I talk to the grays. Some of them have actually become big customers.

I also have trolls who became some of my best customers.

I don’t automatically block trolls. I’ll put them on display. I’ll give them a hard time.

Sometimes they’ll come in calling me names, and I’ll basically tell them, “Okay, come on. You’re up.”

Then they’ll eventually come back and say things like, “I haven’t had an experience like that in a long time. You’re beautiful. I love you.”

Gary: You’ve basically turned trolling into customer retention.

Erica: Exactly.

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Common Cam Scams

Gary: Let’s talk about the token scam, because I think that’s something new models need to understand.

Erica: They’ll make it look like they tipped you when they didn’t.

On the platforms, a real tip usually comes with a notification sound and appears in the appropriate place on your screen. Scammers will imitate those notifications or type fake messages into the chat that make it look like they sent you tokens.

They’ll also pretend to be platform staff.

I’ve had people claim they’re a Stripchat bot or someone working for the platform and tell me I need to go private with them, or that another model reported me for taking customers off-platform.

I’ll tell them, “Show me your credentials.”

I’m not taking anything off until I know who I’m dealing with.

New models need to understand that people will do whatever they can to get something for free.

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The Endless Requests for Free Content

Erica: You’ll get people asking for everything for free.

They’ll say, “Can you lower the price of the private?”

I’m like, “What do you do for a living?”

“I’m a carpenter.”

“Do you negotiate your paycheck?”

Then there are the guys who want to DM you all day long for practically nothing.

And unsolicited pictures are another whole thing.

Some guys seem to think there’s some kind of confidentiality agreement between cam models and customers.

There isn’t.

I’m not your doctor. I’m not your therapist. This isn’t patient confidentiality.

They’ll tell me the craziest personal things.

One guy literally told me he had an accident at work and asked why I would tell anyone.

I’m thinking, “Why are you telling me this?”

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More Than Just Sex Work

Gary: That’s interesting because people look at a cam model and assume she’s just looking for attention.

Erica: That’s exactly the stereotype.

People will say things like, “Your family must be disappointed in you,” or, “You must have been abused.”

My father was actually very proud of me. He always said that as long as I was happy, healthy, and okay, he didn’t care what I did.

And that’s how I look at this.

I’m an entrepreneur. Yes, I’m doing adult content, but I’m also a therapist, a comedian, a troll, a teacher, and a bunch of other things.

I’m a jack of all trades.

Gary: That’s what I mean. Your body is part of the business, but it’s not the entire business.

Erica: Exactly. People think it’s just about showing your body. It’s not.

You need a personality. You need something that keeps people coming back.

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The MILF Niche

Gary: You really lean into the MILF identity.

Erica: Absolutely. That’s my niche.

I was a young mom, so I’ve always been called a MILF. I figured, why not make that part of the brand?

The whole “good boy” and “mommy” thing works for me because I genuinely enjoy playing with that dynamic.

I’ve also discovered just how many different kinks exist.

I thought I was pretty open-minded because I’d already worked in phone sex. Then I started camming and realized I knew almost nothing.

I felt like I was Amish.

I spent days researching different kinks and watching content just trying to understand what people were into.

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Learning to Set Boundaries

Erica: One of the biggest things camming taught me was how to have boundaries.

I used to be a yes-person. I didn’t have a backbone. I’d let people blur lines.

Now I choose myself.

I respect myself more than anybody else, and this is what I say goes. If you can’t respect that, leave.

Camming taught me that you have to have boundaries because there are people who can sense when you don’t have them. They’ll take advantage of you.

That’s why I tell new girls to do their homework.

Google things.

Research the platforms.

What works for me might not work for you. I can tell you what I do, but you still have to figure out what works for your personality and your audience.

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Helping New Cam Models

Erica: I see new girls asking questions in camming communities, and sometimes people are unnecessarily cruel to them.

A new model will ask which sites are good, and someone will basically tell her to figure it out herself.

I don’t understand that.

We’re already looked down on by a lot of people. We don’t need to tear each other down too.

One girl was getting absolutely destroyed because she wasn’t getting paid for some of the shows she was doing.

I told her what I did when I first started and gave her some advice.

A while later she messaged me and said she’d followed my advice and wasn’t getting stiffed anymore.

That’s what I want new models to understand.

You don’t have to be rude to people, but you absolutely have to protect yourself.

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Don’t Work for Free

Erica: I had to cut off one of my good customers because he didn’t pay me.

He said it was an accident.

I don’t care.

You knew what happened, and I’m not going to keep doing business with someone who doesn’t pay.

I blocked him from contacting me elsewhere, but I didn’t necessarily block him from watching me.

I actually want some of these people to see me doing well.

I’ll let them watch, but they don’t get access to me.

Sometimes I’ll mute them so they can see what’s happening but can’t participate.

You have to put your foot down.

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Camming Can Become Addictive

Erica: Another thing new models need to understand is that camming can become addictive.

I’ve been doing it full-time for more than a year, and there have been periods where I was working seven days a week.

I’m constantly camming, networking, talking to regulars, answering messages, and maintaining everything around the business.

Sometimes I forget I’m not working.

I’ll start talking dirty out of habit.

It becomes a lifestyle.

That’s why you need to take breaks.

You have to remember that you have a life outside of the camera.

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Don’t Fall in Love With Customers

Erica: And don’t fall in love with your customers.

I’ve seen girls get completely emotionally invested.

They’ll say, “I fell in love with him, but he’s still on the cam sites.”

I’m like, “What did you expect?”

He’s still going to be on the sites.

Some guys are extremely smooth. They’ll convince a model they’re special, and then she’ll move across the country for him.

Then she’ll discover he’s still using cam sites.

You have to remember what business you’re in.

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The Importance of Personality

Gary: You mentioned personality earlier. How important do you think that is?

Erica: Extremely important.

Everybody likes something different. Some people like bigger women, some like skinny women, some like blondes, some like brunettes.

There’s a niche for everybody.

But for most cam models, you need personality.

You need something beyond your looks.

And when you walk into your cam room, leave whatever is going on in your personal life at the door.

Customers can sense your mood.

I’ve had things happen in my personal life while I’ve been camming. I’ve lost pets, I’ve had bad days, and sometimes I’ve cried.

You’re human.

But you still have to remember that the people watching you are there for an experience.

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The Reality of Going Public

Erica: When somebody tells me they’re thinking about getting into camming, I tell them there are two questions they need to answer.

First:

Are you okay with videos and pictures of you being naked or doing adult things being online forever?

Because they are going to be there.

You can submit DMCA takedowns. You can get websites removed from search results. You can fight copyright infringement.

But once something is online, you have to assume it’s going to exist somewhere forever.

Second:

Are you okay with your family and friends finding out?

Because once people know, they may treat you differently.

Your family might judge you. Your friends might judge you. A future employer might judge you.

You need to be prepared for that before you start.

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Protecting Your Money

Erica: And if you’re making money, save it.

Don’t blow everything.

You’re going to have more bills once you start making more money.

Save it. Invest it.

I started investing some of my money even though I’m not an expert in the stock market.

You don’t have to know everything. Just start thinking about the future.

You can’t assume you’ll cam forever, so use the money you’re making now to build something for later.

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Content Theft and Copyright

Erica: Another huge problem is content theft.

My content gets stolen and uploaded all over the internet.

What’s weird is that some of these websites know things about me that I don’t even understand how they know.

I’ll finish a stream on Chaturbate and sometimes it seems like the recording is online almost immediately.

I’ve also dealt with websites putting incorrect information about me in their bios.

I’ve learned how to handle some of the takedown process myself.

You can submit copyright complaints to Google and other services. It doesn’t make the content disappear from the internet completely, but you can sometimes get it removed from search results.

I’ve had pages and pages of infringement notices.

And there will always be more.

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Social Media Bans

Gary: You’ve also had a lot of problems with social media.

Erica: I’ve been banned from almost everything.

I can’t seem to keep a Snapchat account. Instagram has also been a problem.

Telegram is basically the platform I’m using now.

I have a Telegram channel called OVmilf’s Dressing Room.

I’ll go live before I get on Stripchat and show people my outfit. I’ll ask them what they think, even though I’m probably going to wear whatever I want anyway.

It’s a way for people to interact with me without me charging them.

Then sometimes they’ll book a private afterward.

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Don’t Rush the Private

Erica: One thing I’ve learned is not to rush through a private show.

If I get into a private, I don’t necessarily get naked immediately.

I’ll talk to them first.

Otherwise, some guys will get everything ready, get off in a minute or two, and leave.

If I’m charging for my time, you’re paying for my time.

So we’ll talk.

“How’s the weather?”

“What’s going on?”

Then eventually they’ll say, “Okay, baby. Get naked.”

And I’m like, “We’re getting there.”

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The Importance of Playing Your Own Character

Gary: You’ve got a pretty distinct personality.

Erica: I can’t really do a fake persona.

I tried using another name and character, but it didn’t feel right.

I’m Erica.

What you see is what you get.

I don’t try to pretend to be somebody else.

Obviously, I keep some parts of my personal life private, but I’m not going to create some completely different character.

Gary: I think it’s pretty obvious when somebody is genuinely themselves.

Erica: Exactly.

Some people can’t even tell when somebody is acting.

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The Business Is a Mental Game

Erica: A big part of what I do is reading people.

You have to understand that customers are looking for opportunities to get something from you.

You have to make sure there aren’t cracks in your boundaries.

If they see one little weakness, they’ll find it.

I think of it like Casino. Everybody is trying to rob the house.

That’s what customers are doing.

They’re trying to get as much as they can for as little as possible.

So I have to play chess with them.

I have to figure out what they’re looking for and make sure I’m still in control.

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The Reality of Working With Customers

Erica: Even if somebody is the nicest person in the world, they’re still there because they want something.

Maybe they want attention.

Maybe they want sexual content.

Maybe they want conversation.

Maybe they want a fantasy.

Whatever it is, I need to understand what they’re looking for while maintaining my boundaries.

I actually enjoy the mental game.

When someone thinks they’re going to manipulate me and I turn the situation around, that’s satisfying.

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The Role of Chatters and Studios

Erica: Another thing people don’t always realize is that some of the people chatting with you aren’t actually the model.

Sometimes you’re talking to a chatter or someone working behind the scenes.

I’ve had people get angry when I explain that.

Why are you ashamed of your girl?

If you’re paying somebody to talk to customers, embrace it.

That’s part of the business.

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The Humor Behind the Job

Erica: You have to be able to laugh.

People ask me the most ridiculous questions.

Somebody asked to see my feet, so I told him I didn’t have any.

I made up this entire story about losing my feet to diabetes.

Then he asked about my sexual history, so I told him I had 250 partners.

He couldn’t figure out how somebody with no feet could possibly have 250 sexual partners.

I told him my nurse wheeled me around.

He finally realized I was messing with him.

I play around like that constantly.

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Why Erica Does What She Does

Gary: You’ve got a very different attitude toward the work.

Erica: I think a lot of it comes down to confidence.

I’ve been through some really dark places in my life.

I’ve struggled with my self-worth and how I viewed my body, especially after having children.

Camming changed that.

My self-respect and self-worth are higher than they’ve ever been.

I’ve realized that there are people who genuinely appreciate all kinds of bodies.

There is somebody out there who likes what you have.

Camming helped me realize my worth.

And it taught me how to set boundaries.

That’s probably one of the biggest things I got from it.

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Advice for Anyone Thinking About Camming

Gary: If somebody is thinking about getting into camming, what would you tell them?

Erica: Do your research.

Don’t just sign up because you see somebody online claiming they’re making thousands of dollars.

It isn’t instant money.

You don’t just turn on a camera and suddenly money falls from the sky.

You have to promote yourself.

You have to network.

You have to build relationships with regulars.

You have to learn the platforms.

You have to understand scams.

You have to learn how to set boundaries.

And you have to be honest with yourself about whether you’re prepared for your content to exist online permanently.

Also, don’t compare yourself to somebody else.

What works for me might not work for you.

Find your own niche.

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Looking Ahead

Gary: This has been one of the wildest interviews I’ve done.

Erica: What you see is what you get.

Gary: Absolutely.

We had a bunch of technical problems getting started, but we fought through them.

Erica: I was getting so frustrated. I could feel my alter ego, Martha, starting to come out.

Gary: You have an alter ego named Martha?

Erica: I do. And I have a couple of others.

Gary: Stone Cold Steve Austin?

Erica: Yep.

Gary: Can I get a “Hell yeah?”

Erica: Hell yeah!

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A Possible Live Show

Gary: We were also talking about doing a live show where you could actually talk to people who are thinking about becoming cam models.

Erica: That would be fun.

You could have people come on and ask a real cam model questions.

You could even make it like a “scared straight” kind of thing.

Gary: Exactly. A live show where people can ask questions and get honest answers from somebody who’s actually doing it.

Erica: I think that would be great because there’s really nothing like this platform.

You give creators a place to talk about what actually happens in the industry.

It’s also a way for models to network and connect with each other.

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Closing

Gary: Erica, thank you so much for doing this.

Erica: Thank you. I had a great time.

Gary: It doesn’t even feel like we’ve been talking for almost two hours.

Erica: I was nervous at the beginning, especially with all the technical problems, but everything worked out.

Gary: Absolutely. We’ll definitely have to do this again.

And maybe next time we’ll do it live.

Erica: Keep it real.

Gary: That’s what we’re here for.

Thanks again to everyone for watching Cam Girl Diaries. Be sure to follow us on social media, and if you enjoy the show, consider becoming a YouTube member or joining Patreon for members-only videos, live streams, insider information, private Discord access, and more.

We’ll see you next time.